Becoming the Educated Slut

When I started this blog, I was angry, confused, and thrust into the sometimes vomit-inducing waters of dating for the first time in six years. My ex-fiancé had broken up with me because the long-distance relationship was too much for him to handle (though I'm pretty sure it was because his penis wanted to get to know other ladies) without any reason as to why this just "wasn't working" (i.e., his penis just wasn't having any of it). 

To say that the rug had been pulled under me is an understatement. However, I had no problem validating myself in dating other guys quickly thereafter. But dating disasters alone weren't enough for me to warrant the blog. This came later on, when in a moment of weakness and tears, I called my ex and begged him to take me back (after he had flown to see me during Thanksgiving and I was all, thanks, but no thanks I will not be getting back together with you). It was then when he said sure, then backed out, then said yes again (all in a one and a half hour conversation), and I said, um, no thanks. I will not have this flip-flopping going around. So that was that.

A week later, I received an e-mail where he assessed my character of being a stupid slut (because I admitted I had been on one date with a guy and he kissed me. Just that). Then the blog began as a tongue-in-cheek categorization. I mean, if I'm going to be a slut, I'm going to be an educated one, right? So, yeah, that's about it. That's why this blog exists. That and I needed a safe, anonymous place in a corner of the internet where no one would recognize who I am. I also didn't want my ex to know anything about my life.

And now? I'd say writing and time have made me ok again, though I'm still confused. Aren't we all?